3 Conversations Martha Jones Probably Never Had
by TheSecondEvil
Summary: Three scenes depicting phone conversations that Martha Jones has probably never had. Spoilers for DW S3 and the context of Martha's further appearances in the Whoniverse.


#1: Congratulations

Martha had arrived at her local pub several hours previously to celebrate becoming a fully qualified Doctor. Her parents had put in a brief appearance, as they preferred to celebrate later in the week by going out for dinner as a family. Leo and Tish were still about: Tish was involved in a spirited debate with one of Martha's new fellow Doctors while Leo and his mate Steve were holding court with a group of girls relating scandalous stories of their youth.

Martha extricated herself from a conversation she was having with a gorgeous nurse by the name of Chris in order to grab another drink. She was slightly wobbly on her feet at first but she took a moment to steady herself and moved purposefully towards the bar.

"Good sir, I require ale!" To emphasize the point Martha banged her fist on the bar. Then she rubbed it to ease the pain.

The barman looked at her mildly amused as he poured someone else's lager. "You're in high spirits."

"Oh! Yes! Spirits! Get me your finest…" Martha struggled to remember what spirits she actually liked. "Southern Comfort! Yes, that's it. Southern Comfort and lemonade if you please." She paused before adding. "Once you're done with your present customer of course."

"Of course."

Just then Martha's mobile rang. She rooted around for it; trying to remember which pocket it was in before successfully finding it in her right jacket pocket. She answered the phone with a slurred and lengthy hello.

"Doctor Martha Jones." The caller's familiar voice said in an admonishing tone. "You finally qualify after all that hard work and your first thought is to go and get lashed?" He then went on in an amused voice. "Mind you, I'm not one to talk. The day I graduated from the academy, oh what a bender we went on. You know there are songs sung on some worlds about how colossally wasted we got. Jaturin Prime was never the same after we got done with it, still tilts to this very day."

"Doctor!" Martha exclaimed happily. "How'd you get my number?"

"Your old phone has your Mum's number programmed in. I gave Francine a ring and she gave it to me. That was an awkward conversation. Well, at least it was to begin with but then we got to chatting and she's had an interesting life your Mum, hasn't she? Did she ever tell you about that time in France with the polo player and baguette? Amazing!"

"Oh God." The last thing Martha wanted to think about was the Doctor having a nice long chat with her Mum. Fortunately the barman had fixed her drink and was bringing it over to her. She grabbed a fiver from her wallet and handed it over to him in exchange for the drink. "So what occasions this fine call?" She asked as the barman handed over her change. "Some big alien muckity-muck you need help with?" In response to the barman's quizzical look Martha gave him a sarcastic roll of the eyes to show she was joking and headed over to a quieter corner of the pub where she could speak to the Doctor in peace.

"Ah, well um…" The Doctor's tone calmed. "I just wanted to ring and say congratulations on becoming a fully fledged Doctor. I'm proud of you Martha."

Martha blushed with pride. "So any chance you could congratulate me in person? You could buy me a drink."

"Were you not listening to the Jaturin Prime story?" The Doctor asked rhetorically. "I can't right now. Places to go, people to see. But I'll see you again soon."

"Okay, I guess I'll see you when I see you." Martha sighed and hung up. She took a moment to reflect on how she missed him. Then she shook it off and looked around for that gorgeous nurse she was talking to earlier.

#2: Recruitment

Martha entered her flat just as the phone started ringing. She dumped her shopping bags on the floor and answered the phone. "Hello?"

"Dr Martha Jones?" An unfamiliar female voice asked.

"This is she."

"I'm Brigadier Bambera from the United Nations Intelligence Taskforce colloquially known as UNIT. It's my understanding that you could be of some assistance to us."

Martha was puzzled, she knew about UNIT from visiting the Valiant during her encounter with the Master and had even spent some time during The Lost Year visiting UNIT bases. However as far as she was aware there was no reason for them to be interested in her.

She decided to play dumb. "How could I be of assistance to you Brigadier? I have no experience with the military or the Intelligence services. I'm just a Doctor."

"UNIT has a long track record of recruiting civilian advisors and you come highly recommended from a mutual acquaintance. A fellow medical practitioner if you catch my meaning."

"Wait, you mean…" Martha began.

Bambera immediately cut her off. "I'd rather not discuss specifics over the phone. Are you busy Thursday? We can set up a meeting to discuss this further."

"I'm available." Martha answered. "What time?"

"I was thinking we could meet at 1300… I mean one o'clock. A vehicle will arrive to escort you half an hour beforehand. Is that acceptable to you?"

"Uh… sure. Don't you need my address?"

"We know where you live Dr Jones. Good day." That brief dismissal signalled the end of the conversation and Bambera immediately hung up.

"Of course you do." Martha said with a sigh. She replaced the phone on its base station and made herself a cup of tea. She had a lot to think about.

#3: Subterfuge

Martha had just crossed the border and was back in England when her phone started to blast the opening lines of Rocky Horror's 'Time Warp'. She pulled over into a nearby lay-by and answered the phone. "Martha Jones."

A rather exuberant voice answered her. "Good on you pulling over before answering your phone. Very responsible!" Before Martha could ask how he knew she was driving the voice continued rather more soberly. "So, what do you think?"

It was a question Martha had been expecting ever since she had departed from The Hub and how she was going to answer had constantly been on her mind. She decided that the best tactic was plain honesty. "They're definitely shady and Jack's keeping things from UNIT but it looks like he's doing what he thinks is right."

Martha got a world-weary sigh in response. "They always do." There was a brief silence and then he continued. "But he's not necessarily the one I'm worried about. What about his team? Can they be trusted?"

"They're a fractious bunch but I'd say their loyalties are to Jack more than Torchwood. If you can trust Jack, then you can trust his team." Martha paused momentarily and decided to ask the question that had been on her mind since their last conversation. "Doctor, why did you ask me to do this? Why not investigate Torchwood yourself?"

"I've been a bit busy." The Doctor replied distractedly, unknown to Martha wrestling with the TARDIS controls. "Crashing spaceships, unstable volcanoes, intergalactic war, killer robots, you know the sort of thing. Besides, you had a legitimate reason to drop by and I trust in your opinion Martha."

"Thanks." Martha grinned at the compliment. "So how would you like me to proceed?"

"Keep an eye on him, just in case." The Doctor's tone became slightly more jovial. "I want to be the first to know about any Boeness."

Martha smiled. "Understood. Don't be a stranger."

"Never." The Doctor replied and Martha could almost imagine the wide grin as he said it.


End file.
